I'm reading Luke's account of Jesus' crucifixion in chapters 22 & 23 of his book.
Out of control. I know that if I had been a groupie through the night and morning that Luke describes, I would have been convinced that God was nowhere in the neighborhood. Random chaos.
And yet...millenia before the night of chaos, God had carefully thought through an audacious plan to pick up the tab for the sins of the world by allowing a mob scene to throw Him up on a cross. In the middle of events spinning out of control God was there.
And this brings great comfort to my soul. It reminds me that when my life feels like chaos and I know instinctively that God has vanished because He certainly wouldn't be party to the looting, burning and teargas that's shredding my life...He is there. I know this to be true, because when the smoke cleared three days later, the most beautiful thing had happened. The world, quite literally, was a different place.
Looking back on those lost times of chaos in my own life, I'm prone to think that it is precisely the dark nights of chaos in my life, when God seems to have gone AWOL, that produce the most profound and positive changes.
God is there.